KHOU Interview on Facebook and Divorce

There has been a lot in the news lately about how facebook can play a role in divorce, both being a catalyst for divorce and the content being used as evidence in divorce cases.

I was interviewed yesterday by Courtney Zubowski on Channel 11 (KHOU) on a story she did about facebook and divorce, you can check out the story here.

Fort Bend County has only two divorce courts (technically they are known as “family courts”), the 328th District Court and the 387th District Court. Both courts are located in the old courthouse at 401 Jackson Street in Richmond, Texas. The presiding judge for the 328th District Court is Judge Ronald Pope and the presiding judge for the 387th District Court is Judge Robert Kern. I have had many cases in both courts and find both judges to be fair, conscientious and dedicated to following the law in their rulings.

Judge Kern has been a Fort Bend County family law judge since 1999. Judge Pope has been on the bench in Fort Bend since 2003. The Associate Judge for the 328th District Court is Brenda Mullinix. The Associate Judge for the 387th District Court is Walter Armatys.

The handling of a divorce case in Fort Bend County is very similar to that of Harris County, although there are some significant procedural differences in practice. For example, in every Harris County family law court after a divorce case is filed the court will issue a Scheduling Order which will set that case for trial, with the trial date usually being six to nine months after the case was filed. In Fort Bend County there is no such automatic scheduling and in order to have a trial the lawyer for one of the parties (after meeting certain pre-trial requirements) has to request a trial date and have it set on the courts docket. So if neither party’s lawyer pushes the case towards trial it can remain pending for quite some time. This sometimes catches lawyers who aren’t familiar with Fort Bend procedures off guard, wondering when they will be set for trial.

Ultimately though, the same Family Code and Rules of Procedure and Rules of Evidence apply, so in practice a Fort Bend County divorce case is not all that different from a Harris County divorce case.

It is very common in my practice to use an informal settlement agreement early in a case.  When sufficient information exists to address all issues it can be very helpful to make an early offer via an informal settlement agreement, ideally in the first month or so in the case.  This will often settle the case outright, or at least begin a settlement dialogue.  In my opinion in most cases this is far more advantageous to the client than waiting until the case is several months old.  In other words, I like to begin with the end in mind and at least attempt to settle the case in the early stages.  While the informal settlement agreement is a great tool in a divorce case, based on a precise reading of the statute its use is limited to divorce cases.   As stated in the statute, “the parties to a dissolution of a marriage may agree” to reach an informal settlement agreement.  Thus, the statute appears to not apply to other family law issues such as paternity cases or modification cases and those cases are still limited to the use of mediation agreements or rule 11 agreements.

It is important to note that some cases are not good candidates for the early use of an informal settlement agreement, such as ones that require immediate temporary orders or where the client has insufficient information on the finances and discovery will be needed.  But in a typical divorce case it can be extremely helpful in reaching a reasonable resolution early, before the parties have expended a great deal in attorneys fees or gotten overly contentious about the case.

Here  is an interesting new issue in Texas family law – what happens when a Texas citizen gets married in another state and then, while living in Texas, wants to get divorced?  Oh, and one other thing,  it is a same-sex marriage.

While same-sex marriage is not recognized in Texas, it is legal in several other states. At some point we will get an answer to the question because a Dallas man filed for divorce from his husband last week.  They were married in Massachusetts in 2006 and have resided in Dallas ever since.

The Texas Attorney General has indicated that he will intervene in the case and seek its dismissal based on the constitutional prohibition against gay marriage.

This leaves the same-sex couple who are splitting up in a strange predicament.  They probably can’t get divorced in Texas since the state does not recognize them as married.  They could get divorced in Massachusetts where their marriage is recognized, but first one of them would have to meet the statutory residency requirement (one year) before filing.

I have said for years when it comes to gay marriage and divorce, why should us heterosexuals have all the fun?

I thought the best overall advice in the article was the suggestion to have open and frequent discussions about the state of the family finances and to talk about family financial goals.

This is a good read for anyone who is beginning the divorce process and wants to stay grounded throughout it. Her advice is actually quite similar to the advice I gave in an earlier article I wrote on keeping divorce costs down.

I have never advised a client to get divorced, as I feel that this is a very personal decision and one that ultimately the client is the only one qualified to make. The choice is theirs and theirs alone. There are a number of reasons people decide to get divorced. A short list includes extramarital affairs, a lack of shared interests, lack of communication and generally growing apart. When both spouses are motivated to do so many of these issues can be addressed and ultimately resolved with the assistance of an experienced marriage counselor.

The decision to divorce should never be taken lightly and should never be made immediately after an argument. You have to consider the impact of divorce not only on yourself, but if you have children, the impact on them as well. Factors include not only emotional issues, but also practical considerations such as finances, where you will live, et cetera.

Of course what I’m describing is the typical situation. A very different set of criteria comes into play when there are instances of physical or sexual abuse. With these kinds of situations you must act immediately and take appropriate action, including immediately contacting an attorney.

But when the more typical situation exists – that is, two spouses who just don’t see eye to eye on some or several issues, then a marriage counselor can be of great assistance in helping the parties to communicate more effectively and possibly resolve the problem areas.